| all these lines fall short of what i had in mind... |
[entries|friends|calendar] |
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| this may be the last thing that i write for long |
[27 Jul 2004|01:26am] |
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ATTENTION EVERYONE WHO HAS ME AS THEIR FRIEND! I'M GETTING RID OF THIS LIVEJOURNAL NAME, NOT RID OF IT BUT BARELY EVER WILL I COME BACK TO IT AND USE IT. I HAVE A NEW ELJAY NAME SO PLEASE ADD ME. IT'S A_VIVID_ROMANCE AND MY NAME IS NIKI/NICOLE INCASE YOU FORGOT. THAT'S ALL BYE BYE BEAUTIFUL <3
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| I need to spill my heart out |
[19 Jul 2004|03:14pm] |
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the juliana theory |
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ok, so people say i'm different and i have no idea why. let me spill my heart and try and figure it out.
things that are bugging me
- working all the time, amanda working all the time, we never really have time to do things but when we do things it's great even if it's at 1 in the morning.
- i haven't talked to my pat not even enough lately and i need him.
- i'm going to see my pat in like 2 weeks and 2 days and i'm scared that it could either make or break our relationship but i'm not worried about it. I love him so much and i don't want to lose him, ever. i don't care if nobody understands this... i do and that's what matters.
- i realized yesterday after spending time with my family how much i actually miss them, i ALMOST cried.
- lately i've felt like i don't belong... not like belong here in vegas just like i don't belong on this earth. how suicidal does that sound? i don't want to die or anything i just feel like i don't belong here.
that's all i can think of so far. i need to get ready for work. drive thru sucks, i lost interest in it real quickly. front counter cashier is so much better. oh well. bye
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| without you is somethign that i could never do |
[17 Jul 2004|11:25pm] |
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saosin |
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x. father thinks I am: a failure and he probably thinks i'm just like my mother.
x. mother thinks I am: better than ever, she's proud of me and for that we've been closer than ever also.
x. three things you are often complimented for: being a sweetheart, my happy attitude, my eyes
x. you get embarrassed when: it takes a lot to embarrass me
x. makes you happy: music
x. upsets you: finding out my mom is struggling with things and i can't help her out
x. you keep a diary: never
x. you like to cook: LOVE TO
x. you have a secret: maybe
x. you bite your fingernails: yeah but shhh that's a secret haha
x. you believe in love: definately
Do You...?
take a shower everyday: ever sunDAY. haha and everyother day yes
have a crush: nope but i'm in love
need to tell someone something: maybe
think you were ever loved by someone: yes
want to get married?: yes
have piercings?: yes
get motion sickness: not really like ever
think you're a health freak: kinda
get along with your parents: kinda
like thunderstorms: love them.
SCREEN NAMES: makethislovehurt, chapangeleyez86, xcheerupemokid04
NATURAL HAIR COLOR: light brown
CURRENT HAIR COLOR: brown
BIRTHPLACE: las vegas, nv
( FAVORITES )
COLOR: purple
DAY: saturday
MONTH: june/july/august
SONG: _______ fill in the blank because i can't
FOOD: anything italian
SEASON: summer
SPORT: football/baseball
DRINK: water, or mountain dew but i quit that game
ALCOHOLIC: none
VEGGIE: broccoli, asparagus, carrots, all the good stuff. no onions or potatoes though.
( PREFERENCES )
CHOCOLATE MILK, OR HOT CHOCOLATE? chocolate milk gives me tummy aches. i love hot chocolate though.
MILK, DARK, OR WHITE CHOCOLATE? not too muich of a chocolate fan but i hate dark chocolate.
VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE? vanilla
( IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU.... )
CRIED? yes
BOUGHT SOMETHING? yes
GOTTEN SICK? no
GONE TO THE MOVIES? no
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? no
SAID I LOVE YOU? yes
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER? no
TALKED TO AN EX? no
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? livejournal
HAD A SERIOUS TALK? yes with my mother
MISSED SOMEONE? yes
HUGGED SOMEONE? no :(
FOUGHT WITH YOUR PARENTS? no
FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND? no
name 10 bands/artists you listen to: taking back sunday,hidden in plain view, saosin, funeral for a friend, fall out boy, coheed & cambria, glassjaw, new found glory, the early november, fear before the march of flames.
Would You Ever..
1. Eat a bug? not unless there is money involved.
2. Bungee jump? yes
3. Hang glide? yes
4. Kill someone? no
7. Have sex with someone of the same sex? no
8. Parachute from a plane? yes
9. Walk on hot coals? ouch i have sensitive feet :(
10. Go out with someone for their looks? no
11. For their reputation? no
12. Be a vegetarian? no
13. Wear plaid with stripes? haha sounds fun to me
14. IM a stranger? yes
15. Sing karaoke? nah
17. Shoplift? no
18. Run a red light? yes
19. Star in a porn video? no
20. Dye your hair blue? um sure
21. Be on Survivor? probably not that particular show
22. Wear makeup in public? i do everyday
23. NOT wear makeup in public? yes
24. Cheat on a test? probably not
25. Make someone cry? never intentionally
26. Call your math teacher a motherfucker? haha never!
27. Kick a baby? dude no
28. Date someone more than ten years older than you? um i'm good but thanks. unless it was my old math teacher then hell yes
29. Cuss out a priest? neh
30. Take a job as a janitor? maybe a rich persons janitor
31. Wear a thong? eh that's not really my style but yes i would
32. Stay up all through the night? yeah it's fun
33. Drink straight espresso? probably not
34. Betray a friend? no
35. Go for a friend’s sibling? haha probably not
36. Run away? neh
37. Go out with someone you hardly knew? where we going to the mall or something? sure
38. Be on Jerry Springer? no
39. Have a one night stand? no
40. Give an ex a 2nd chance? neh that's not my style
41. Date a friend? maybe
42. Kidnap your friend’s kid?: no way
43. Dress as a clown in public? for how much?
44. Dress up as any weird character? for how much again?
45. Go on a blind date? maybe
46. Be on the Bachelor/Bachelorette? no way
47. Jump off a cliff? maybe not
48. Pick up a hitch-hiker? maybe not
49. Commit suicide? maybe NOT
50. Love your enemy? neh that's not my style
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| holy mah glaciers! i'm updating kinda |
[16 Jul 2004|10:18pm] |
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taking back sunday |
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you are violet
#EE82EE |
Your dominant hues are red and blue. You're confident and like showing people new ideas. You play well with others and can be very influential if you want to be.
Your saturation level is lower than average - You don't stress out over things and don't understand people who do. Finishing projects may sometimes be a challenge, but you schedule time as you see fit and the important things all happen in the end, even if not everyone sees your grand master plan.
Your outlook on life is bright. You see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything.
| | the spacefem.com html color quiz |
that's not like my favorite color or anything. muahaha.
30 days.
18 days.
11 days.
YAY!
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| won't you hold me now? |
[11 Jul 2004|06:27pm] |
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d/c + bend and not break |
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dear friend,
please make me not so tired on my days off so i can do things instead of want to sleep. amanda and i have both been working like crazy. unfortunately it never ends. and she got a vacation which is something i didn't really get unless you count me moving here a vacation then i guess i got it. but it's ok august 4-8th i'm going to good ol san jose to see none other than my boyfriend pat. I'm like really excited and stuff but i'm a little scared too. but anyways today sunday july 11th is my third day off since like june 22nd. and one day was spent almost dying at warped tour. crazy huh? well my friend this is how my life is. I miss all the people on here that i usually talk to but now i have no time to. yeah well if that's you, i miss you terribly. I said I'd make a warped tour review but honestly i'll never get around to it. there are bands that i missed and that sucks but i'll live i guess. for example, the bled and anatomy of a ghost. if people would've told me that aoag was actually going to be there and i got to see them i would've shat my pants. but anyway here's who i got to see: senses fail, thursday, new found glory, the early november, taking back sunday, alkaline trio, i kinda saw yellowcard but not really more like heard, same with story of the year but i didn't want to see them anyway, coheed and cambria, i kinda saw underoath but more like heard, I think there was more but i'm blanking it all out. I decided after tbs that taking back sunday will be the death of me. I almost died up in the front and i would've died too just to see them so close and scream my lungs out right there. oh yes ATT: ALL CROWDSURFERS!! TO HELL WITH YOU AND ALL YOUR FRIENDS, IT'S ON I HOPE YOU DIE BECAUSE IT'S PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT EFFIN ALMOST KILLED ME AT WARPED TOUR AND A GIRL SHOULDN'T HAVE TO ALMOST DIE TO SEE ONE OF HER FAVORITE FUCKING BANDS KTHNXBY!! and that my dear friend is all i have to say about warped tour. I met joe from hidden in plain view but unfortunately i didn't get to see them because they were playing at the same time as alkaline trio and alkaline trio is in my like top 3 favorite bands. nothing else has happened since then, I saw my family on thursday for a little bit which was nice. I miss them kinda. i'll see my little sister and little brother sometime before they go back to colorado though so it's ok. alright, I'm dizzone.
p.s. I saw spider-man 2 last night. it was cute and i liked it i just wish i wasn't so tired and struggling to keep my eyes open. i think tonight we're going to see the notebook or something.
but i'm totally not excited ;)
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| escabar rules!! |
[07 Jul 2004|01:14am] |
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ok so... here is my update.
-warped tour on sunday rocked my freakin world like always. taking back sunday WILL be the death of me (i'll go more into detail on warped tour later no worries)
-working like no other has got me busier than a mofo
-I get to see my mother, little brother, and little sister on thursday for a little bit before work. this excites me incredibly.
- I bought 4 new band shirts at warped tour that rock my face. the early november, taking back sunday, hidden in plain view, and underoath.
-my birthday is in like 39 days and that excites me because people are actually coming to see ME on my birthday and that makes me feel really special. I can't wait.
alright i'm super tired and i'm going to bed so goodnight and once again i will update about my awesome awesome day at warped tour
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| quiet is my loudest cry |
[02 Jul 2004|10:45am] |
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first off... I'm Jenn's, Jackie's, and Stephanie's best friend! YAY!
My Best Friend is ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) _unexplainable | | Our 86 common interests are: 2gether, a static lullaby, alkaline trio, armor for sleep, atreyu, autopilot off, blink 182, bowling, boys night out, brand new, breaking pangea, bright eyes, catcher in the rye, coheed and cambria, concerts, conor oberst, count the stars, cursive, dashboard confessional, death cab for cutie, denver harbor, drive thru records, emo, emo boys, empire records, endor, every time i die, fall out boy, fight club, finch, foo fighters, from autumn to ashes, further seems forever, glassjaw, green day, hardcore, hot hot heat, jamisonparker, jimmy eat world, matchbook romance, matt skiba, midtown, moneen, motion city soundtrack, movies, music, mxpx, my chemical romance, ncn worship, new found glory, norma jean, northstar, piebald, pretty girls make graves, rufio, rx bandits, saosin, saves the day, ska, something corporate, spitalfield, stars, straylight run, student rick, taking back sunday, teenage mutant ninja turtles, the ataris, the blood brothers, the early november, the exit, the get up kids, the juliana theory, the movielife, the postal service, the reunion show, the smiths, the start, the starting line, the used, thursday, underoath, vanilla coke, waffles, warped tour, will noons hair, yellowcard | Who is your best friend?
| | Created by macoto |
( everyone else )
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| nothing will change but the channel |
[30 Jun 2004|11:34pm] |
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new found glory + who am I |
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so I finally bought catalyst today and right now i'm loving it. I think i'll sleep while listening to it. I want to get underoath's new cd because i heart underoath but i wanted to get peoples opinions about the cd first so... anybody? work today was nice except i really don't like closing but it's something i can deal with. I promised myself that I would eat more but I lied. crap! i talked to the one and only kinja last night for like 2 hours! and it was awesome because i don't think there was one moment where it was like awkward and we didn't have anything to talk about. atleast for me haha. anywho, thanks kinja for that phone call! <33 I went to go buy midtowns new cd today but they didn't have it at walmart so during my lunch break i ended up buy nfg. which is fine by me because i'll get midtown too whenever i go to best buy. tomorrow is my first day off in 9 flippin days!#!@@# I'm excited, I'm going swimming all day long so i hope the weather is nice. warped tour is on sunday and i get paid on friday. oooh heaven is a place on earth. my mom, her boyfriend, and sean (my little brother!!!!) will be here on the 7th!!@#!@# YAYAYAYAYAYAY!! I can't believe tomorrow is the first day of july. holy jeeze i just graduated like yesterday but i guess it really WAS a month and like 11 days ago. holy wow. the end... now there's a real update for you. eh hem. goodnight!
haha this made me smile for some reason...???
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| yayayayayayaya |
[28 Jun 2004|01:36pm] |
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the early november |
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I'm so excited for warped tour! and i'm so excited for amanda coming home! in like a week! but it doesn't matter because it'll happen sooner or later!
also, I made a new screen name that I like a lot so add me and talk to me on it please!! makethislovehurt k thanks!
and then that was the end of me updating because my life is boring and all i do is work. the end. <3
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| work, work and more work |
[26 Jun 2004|02:26pm] |
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this is what living like this does... muahahaha. I love you all. the end.
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| i gots an owie :( |
[24 Jun 2004|07:51pm] |
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midtown + give it up |
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grrrr i hate when you write a bunch of crap about your day and then it disappears. today was my first day at my new job. I now have 2 jobs and my next day off of either of them is july 4th for warped tour. jeeze. i might have thursday off but that's all up to burger king. so i worked 8 1/2 hours today. wooo. during my lunch i went to wal mart and bought the spiderman 2 soundtrack for 9.50. yay! and then after work i went to fashion bug and bought some new pants (the cute ones my amanda has that she loves) yeah i bought those. and then i went to burger king for dinner because i get 50% off and i'm cheap. yeah... so i was going to get my drink and i got ice but this guy darril put too much ice in so it was like spitting ice out at the top so i said "hey darril, the ice is like spitting at me." and he responds with "I don't give a fuck. why would i give a shit?" I was like whoa buddy what the hell. and my manage lacha was there and she heard the same thing so darril clocked out and lacha yelled at him for like 20 minutes because he fucking threatened to kill me for telling him that the ice was filled too high because that's his job. so yeah he wanted to kill me and then he left and lacha told him if he says something else to me or even touched me or looked at me she would call the police. so he left and i was freakin afraid of going home for doing fucking nothing. the chances of him having his job there anymore is very slim. I WILL talk to the general manager about this and so will Lacha. fucking pathetic, and he's like 30. UGH. I got maybe 3 hours of sleep last night and very little the night before. got i suck. i'm reading the perks to being a wallflower and that's why i didn't get much sleep last night cuz i couldnt put it down. alright... that's my day folks.
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| I <3 the kick |
[21 Jun 2004|08:47pm] |
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the kick + all the way |
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So saturday night was pretty amazing. reeve oliver = really good. whysall lane = suuuucky. the kick = really really good. the ataris = a m a z i n g. I love them. sunday night we saw them again and amanda and i took our picture with kris roe. kris roe = awesome. we also got pictures with every member of the kick except for the drummer. bummer. haha oh man. so yeah it was really fun. I went into work this morning to find out when i can start working again. sooo i work tomorrow. it's about time. i feel like i haven't worked in forever :( which was like last wednesday but whatev. my birthday is in like 55 days. oh and i talked to my 2 year old brother yesterday on the phone and he said "i love you. I miss you Niki!" awww tear. I miss him soooo much. that's pretty much it. amanda gets off of work in like 10 minutes and i'm not even ready so i gotta go get ready. shhhh don't tell. have a good night!
<3!
Niki
aim - chapangeleyez86
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| so let me slip away... |
[19 Jun 2004|03:02pm] |
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no doubt + running |
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I used to update my eljay like more than once a day and now i suck at it. but anyway tonight is the ataris. wooohoooo!! I'm only suspended for 1 more day but I'm schedualed to work tomorrow. that makes no sense. i'm just not going to show up becuase i signed a thing that said i can't work or get paid for the next 4 days which was like 3 days ago. so yeah... whatev. Pat called me this morning at like 3:30 while I was sleeping. yeah he was drunk and apologized for it like 50 million times. ugh he knows that i don't like when people get drunk AT ALL. that's why i moved away from my mom. and he asked me to marry him, i was like right... whatever. wow... just wow. i love him like a lot. just.... wow. so um, if you read this and you don't know me, or you do.. do me a favor and just leave me a comment and let me know how YOURE doing because really, I'd love to know. ok thanks! :)
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| i'm not wasting anymore time |
[16 Jun 2004|07:59pm] |
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the early november + ever so sweet |
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So today = pretty terrible. Everything was going great at work and then i find out my drawer is 20 dollars short. @!@#!@ 20 bucks, where the hell that 20 is I have no idea but I'm responsible for it and now 20 dollars is going to be taken out of my paycheck and i got suspended for 4 days. Q@#!@#!@#! again. jeeze ass freakin christ. I need a new job. but i like where i'm working, and the people i work with. grrrr. if it happens again which hopefully it won't i'll be terminated. amanda's leaving me in like a week. tear. and and, grrrr I have 1 dollar in my bank account. it's a good thing I get paid next week. I've had the worst stomach Nausea for like 2 days and since yesterday i've eaten cup of noodles, a bite of my salad, and a banana. jeeze ass freakin christ again. Apparently I'm doing something wrong with the whole taking care of myself so does anyone want to take care of me for me? I doubt it. But other than like today and me not feeling good, I've been doing good. better than a month ago. in 2 months from today i'll be legal. yay! and hopefully find a better job. until next time... i'm out.
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| ... |
[14 Jun 2004|08:21pm] |
why should I take your hand when you can't promise happy endings??
<3 amber pacific. so does my amanda =)
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| being lectured by my so called father ugh |
[14 Jun 2004|04:15pm] |
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stolen from keleme
Rules: bold what you've seen all the way through; italicize what you've seen part of; underline what you own; add three of your own.
01. Trainspotting
02. Shrek
03. M
04. Dogma
05. Strictly Ballroom
06. The Princess Bride
07. Love Actually
08. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings
09. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
10. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
11. Reservoir Dogs
12. Desperado
13. Swordfish
14. Kill Bill Vol. 1
15. Donnie Darko
16. Spirited Away
17. Better Than Sex
18. Sleepy Hollow
19. Pirates of the Caribbean
20. The Eye
21. Requiem for a Dream
22. Dawn of the Dead
23. The Pillow Book
24. The Italian Job (the original only)
25. Goonies
26. Basketball
27. The Spice Girls Movie
28. Army of Darkness
29. The Color Purple
30. The Safety of Objects
31. Can't Hardly Wait
32. Mystic Pizza
33. Finding Nemo
34. Monsters Inc.
35. Circle of Friends
36. Mary Poppins
37. The Bourne Identity
38. Forrest Gump
39. A Clockwork Orange
40. Kindergarten Cop
41. On The Line
42. My Big Fat Greek Wedding
43. Final Destination
44. Sorority Boys
45. Urban Legend
46. Cheaper by the Dozen
47. Fierce Creatures
48. Dude, Where's My Car
49. Ladyhawke
50. Ghostbusters
51. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
52. Back to the Future
53. An Affair To Remember
54. Somewhere In Time
55. North By Northwest
56. Moulin Rouge
57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
58. The Wizard of Oz
59. Zoolander
60. A Walk to Remember
61. Chicago
62. Vanilla Sky
63. The Sweetest Thing
64. Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
65. The Nightmare Before Christmas
66. Chasing Amy
67. Edward Scissorhands
68. Adventures of Priscilla: Queen of the Desert
69. Muriel's Wedding
70. Croupier
71. Blade Runner
72. Cruel Intentions
73. Ocean's Eleven
74. Magnolia
75. Fight Club
76. The Beauty and The Beast
77. Much Ado About Nothing
78. Dirty Dancing
79. Gladiator
80. Ever After
81. Braveheart
82. What Lies Beneath
83. Regarding Henry
84. The Dark Crystal
85. Star Wars (the original aka episode 4)
86. The Birds
87. Beaches
88. Cujo
89. Maid In Manhattan
90. Labyrinth
91. Thoroughly Modern Millie
92. His Girl Friday
93. Being John Malkovich
94. Run Lola Run
95. The Color of Paradise
96. While You Were Sleeping
97. Signs
98. The Count of Monte Cristo (2002)
99. Chocolat
100. Breakfast at Tiffany's
101. Cold Comfort Farm
102.Titus
103. What's Up, Tiger Lily?
104. The Empire Strikes Back
105. Dead Ringers
106. Wilde
107. Twelve Monkeys
3 THAT I ADDED:
Raising Helen, Mean Girls, Shrek 2
I don't like own any movies, my mom has them all at home.
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